Love your spouse as yourself

You must constantly work to grow in holy love of yourself.  You are called to love your spouse as yourself; now then, if you do not love yourself, how well can you love your spouse?

Fallen before, begin afresh

If you have fallen in the realm of purity, you must ensure that you have broken all habits pertaining to your fall.  If you have gone farther than you should have, then ensure that whatever actions, patterns or routines you had acquired are destroyed and that you do not bring them with you into marriage! Every action must be a self-gift and allow the other to be a self-gift to you. 

Pray for your future spouse

When you are single you must pray ceaselessly for your future spouse.

Women: this is especially true for you.  Your future husband’s battles are such that you cannot understand or imagine.  Pray for him!

Marriage and the Eucharist

You would not approach the Eucharist if you are not in a state of grace; how dare you approach your spouse! You cannot give yourself to the other if you have left part of yourself in sin.  Go to confession, be cleansed and healed by God, that you may once again be one with your spouse.

Choose your friends

Husband and wife: choose your friends together.  Choose wisely who will be a part of your family.  Male friends of the family should be closest to the husband; female friends should be closest to the wife.  Unfaithfulness can be emotional as well as physical.  Respect each other: if one of you is uneasy with another’s friend or acquaintance, discuss until there is resolution, either in an end to the friendship or pace with it.  There must be total communication in this realm to attain complete unity and trust.  When there is lack of transparency, one cannot trust the other.  There is no reason you cannot reach agreement other than your failure to communicate and listen to each other.

Confident body

“Therefore my heart is glad and my soul rejoices, my body, too, abides in confidence, because you will not abandon my soul to the netherworld, nor will you suffer your faithful one to undergo corruption.” –Psalm 16: 9-10

You need not shrink from your body.  It too, as the expression of your soul, should be filled with confidence in the glory of the resurrection.  It will be raised on the last day, not just your soul!  Our God has taken on our flesh, that it too may be divinized with His Son.

You are nothing

“Neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God, who causes the growth.” 1 Corinthians 3:7

You are proud that you have advised another soul.  You are proud that your friend has taken steps closer to God.  Be humble! For only the Lord has accomplished anything.  You have been His servant, planting seeds and watering them, but planting and watering is nothing compared to the growing.  The growth is all the Lord’s.